Heartbreak. Heartache. Heart sick.
I can’t believe I haven’t had another heart attack.
I don’t know what’s keeping my heart pumping. I don’t know why my blood pressure and my resting heart rate are so low and normal.
It doesn’t make sense.
I can’t tell what is real or imagined. I’m walking through life as if I’m dodging fictional bullets.
Someone sold their house and left the generator on so there is a constant hum outside my office. It makes sense, it’s like my brain.
For some weird reason it stopped yesterday. It was relieving, so euphoric. I mean it was a seemingly little thing but it felt like I was at peace. My mind was at rest but the humming started up again.
The fountain is also broken outside my office. It won’t stop running. I can’t turn it off. Way too many metaphors.
Nothing really makes sense, but better to be allied to nonsense anyway. It doesn’t mean there’s not things to cry about, but thankfully there’s always the absurd.